Third Year's Lessons

This post has looming over me for a few days now (11 days to be exact).  I started a little tradition three years ago, every year on August 8th, I write a post reflecting back over yet another year living abroad. (You can read a little about my first year here and some about my second year here.)  I can say with total certainty that I am not the same person I was three years ago.  Reading back over my past two year's posts has been so embarrassing, humbling, comical and encouraging to see the s-l-o-w transformation that has taken place in me, my family and in our ministry over the past three years.

Whenever I sat down to write this blog celebrating another year, I felt blocked.  I couldn't think of what to write....but a few nights ago, when we were without power (again) and I was able to sleep through the night with no air or fan... and didn't find myself furious, sweating profusely or whining...it dawned on me... this year has been a year of acceptance.

Looking back the first year was a year of excitement of the unknown and new.  A year of immersion, getting to know Barranquilla.  It was a year of many, many changes...adjustments...transitions.  Year two was a year of drastic ups and downs.  A year of doubts, questions, resentment, anger and fears.  It was a year where the new and exciting wore off and reality kicked in.  Year two, was a hard year. Today, I find myself completing my third year here.  I honestly find it hard to believe that it's been three years.  THREE.  Three entire years with only three visits to the US, three years doing without things I miss... three years with very little time with my family... Three years.

This third year has been a year of acceptance.  I've stopped fighting God so much and I have begun to accept that this is where He has me in this moment and time.  I've started accepting some of the major differences in culture, food and technology that used to infuriate and confuse me.  I've started accepting that no matter how much I "transition" into Colombia, I will never "fit" in.  I've accepted that my "accent" isn't going anywhere.   I've begun to accept the fact that I am going to be stared at everywhere I go.

A year of acceptance.  In accepting things I've also received a new peace that I didn't have two years ago.  I've fought some demons and had some MAJOR personal victories!  I've slowly started finding my (new) passions and interests and God has been pushing me to do (new) things I never would have never done three years ago.  I've preached a sermon...in Spanish for goodness sake!  I would have never shared my testimony in public three years ago!  I'm leading a school! I'm counseling other women and young people! I'm being a mommy to the sweetest little "gringas" in the world.  I'm falling more in love with my husband as daily I'm shown what a man of God he truly is.  I'm a stronger woman than I've ever been... and I'm just getting started.

This has been a year of many tests.  Many of which, I've failed.  Oh...but I've passed some too!!  I still miss my family, my country, my language and air conditioning every. single. day.  BUT GOD is slowly filling those holes in my heart with more and more of His love.  Every day that passes, I'm learning to confide in Him more... to trust Him more... and I'm truly learning to do something my mom tried to teach me many years ago... I'm learning to take it one day a time.

Here's to ??? years more...